Monday, May 30, 2011

Blog 4

“For I am the Lord your God, who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, Do not fear; I will help you.” Isaiah 41:13

Fears,
What are you afraid of?
Death, rape, the dark, losing a loved one, disappointment, the future, the unknown....


Some of the reasons I love Haiti so much is that is forces me to address my fears. It forces me to go on faith that no matter what happens it is for a reason. So if things happen for a reason, is there a reason to be afraid?

One of our patients died this weekend. He was a boy in his teens with severe cerebral palsy that had left his body contoured in ways that I did not know a body could contort but a face that still could produce a beautiful smile. As much as a Jon was a part of our therapy his mother was. She always had very sad eyes and a weak voice that begged for sympathy. Me, hating sympathy, was always slightly harsh, but evoking smiles out of her on several occasions. Jon on the other hand would smile easily making it seem that was the one part of his body he could control with ease. Not know the reason for Jon’s departure from this earth, it raises a question.... Was it a blessing that he has passed? For his mother’s sake of not having the huge back breaking burden of his care and for him not to live in a contoured body anymore? The weeks before his death, I watched Erin give her time, sweat, excessive girl power, power tools, brain power, and always stopping to ask for other’s people’s opinion to help create for him a wheelchair that would decrease his pain and assist him with sitting in a less contorted position. Jon and mother somehow broke the first attempt at a wheelchair modification and he was on round 2 and half and hours of attention when he was suppose to return today for follow up to finish the chair. We thought it slightly odd that he did not come, since his mother had not missed an appointment yet. Later we found out through another patient that his angle wing arms took him to another place...
Rest relaxed Jon.
Jeanie.

3 comments:

  1. I love you jeanie. so did jon. you and erin are amazing. just think how happy he is now!

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  2. I am so sorry to hear about the loss of Jon. I pray that he is skipping around heaven with that same smile across his face!

    I know that you are bringing great happiness to the Haitians. Your smile and "joie de vivre" is contagious! Keep smiling, loving life and inspiring the rest of us to become better people every day! I love you and am sending endless prayers and thought to both you and Erin.

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  3. Very powerful writing Jeanie. Just to know you is knowing that you are making a difference in Haiti. One thing that my wife told me one time after becoming a nurse has always stuck with me. I asked how she handles seeing people die. She said, there are worse things in life than dying. I immediate could see the truth in that. Not that we want to go BEFORE our time, but Jon no longer lives with pain, his mom no longer has the burden, and many other things.
    As a believer in Jesus as savior, death here means life in heaven. That puts the perspective on "worse things than dying" into a not so bad light.

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